Missing Christmas

I miss Christmas. For the last few years I haven't had a home of my own. It has been hard because where i am I haven't always been welcomeing. It is with family and i haven't always been able to depend on them. They have given me a place to stay but it has been very grudgingly so I have tried to make myself as small as possible. it hasn't always worked but I try. But I miss Christmas so much. I was one of those crazy people who did a ton of baking and then gave them to everyone in sight and I loved it. I had Christmas music playing in November. I got very excited when the Grinch was on TV, and Charlie Brown and Rudolph. Like the rest of my life, I've let it slip away.

Somehow I need to find a place i can call my own, a home, my home. I need quiet, calm, peace, warmth, love, friendship.